Beautiful Damage
by Lotus Hourglass
Summary: The war is testing Allen and his family by damage. His little angel will not last. Semi Au,AreKan,Mpreg


Allen hung his head in defeat as he realized what danger he placed Kanda and his unborn child in. Had he not interfered with Kanda's life...none of this would've happened. There's no going back now; this underground war that will surface soon will have a never ending effect on their lives and it will haunt them forever.

"Sir Walker...it's a boy." Faint cries of the said child was heard. He felt his heart leap with joy. _Wait...why is he...?_

"Matron, you're not telling me what's going on." He narrowed his eyes at her.  
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_"Apparently...your son has a weak body. Kanda had it bad as well. They just have to rest. We'll run some test on your child as soon as he gets the strength he needs."  
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He couldn't just sigh in relief, staring at his raven haired lover while he carried his son in his arms.  
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_"You know I don't like what the Matron meant to say."  
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_"Must be a defect on my side. I'm sorry, Kanda." The raven glared at him for that.  
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_"You, of all the people, should not be sorry. It's just like you're saying that you're sorry for being a father, moyashi. " Allen helped him sit up carefully, a little pain shot up in his system but he kept it to himself._Something's wrong here dammit._  
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_"What are you going to name him, Kanda?" Allen kissed his son's forehead. Gentle wind blew from the window, making the curtains move slightly.  
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_"...Kaze."  
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"Daddy Awen!"

"Hello my little puff of wind~" The little Walker pouted and crossed his little arms.

"I ish a kwitty nao." Allen blinked, noticing the cat ears.

"Please don't tell me Uncle Lavi did this to you..." He flicked his tail happily.

"Bud daaaaaaaaaaddy! I want et!" The white haired father carried his flailing son.

"Okay okay! You're our little Kitty Kaze~"

Despite the happy features he showed, the worry he felt for his son. The past months has proved to be something to worry about; his son has been suffering from anorexia. The Matron says there's traces of depression, but from what, he didn't know. Right now, cheering up his son might help...for now.

"Daddy, can you tell kwitty about Mommy?"

Allen smiled.

"Sure, why not?" He sat on the hospital bed and placed Kaze on his lap. "What do you want to know?"

"How chu two met!" Chocolate eyes eagerly looked up to him.

"Oh I see. Well I met your mommy when we were in High school, he was very popular and was the president of the Kendo club. I just got transfer to that school so I didn't have many friends. but when I accidentally bumped into him on my way to my first class I just couldn't stop from gasping...he was the most beautiful thing I ever seen." He poked Kaze's nose. "You got his looks." He was glad to leave out the parts where they were in danger that time...literally.

"Majide*, Daddy Awen? Kitty does, nyaa?"

"Yup! Anyway, let's just say we...kinda didn't get along. after that we just argued and yelled at each other all the time but then one day...guess what happened?" A smile quickly made its' way to his eyes as he remembered.

"Pwease tell kwitty!"

"Of course, of course...it was one rainy day and school was over, I forgot my umbrella at home and I had to wait for the rain to stop. I ran to a nearby tree and stood under it when I turned to see who was on the other side of the tree. Your mommy was there, sleeping peacefully as small rain drops feel on him. he looked so...breathtaking that I couldn't stop watching him."

Kaze giggled and twitched his ears, "Kawaii~"

"That's what I thought and I carefully placed my jacket over him so not to let him get wet. I didn't want to disturb him so I left. leaving my jacket with him...the next day, he walked up to me and handed my jacket back, he told me to come see him at the tree that afternoon and well..." Allen blushed at the thought.

"What happened, nyaa?"

"Well...we talked, for the first time we talked and I told him that...well, I liked him. He was shocked since we kinda displayed that we argued a lot." He sighed as he remembered that too. "He told me he felt the same way...we only argued because deep down we were attracted to each other and wanted to get the other's attention."

"Aww! And then?"

"I kissed him. And he kissed back. it was a small, gentle kiss...and that just made me fall in love with him all over again."

A pause. Kaze then started to shake violently. Allen carried him close to his chest asking, "K-Kitty? What's wrong?"

"D-Daddy...Awen...?"

It was when what he feared the most happened in front of him.

Kaze vomitted blood, eyes dilated.

"KAZE!" He couldn't help but panic as he tried to clean up the blood. "Oh god, oh god..."

He promised Kanda to stay level headed at situations like this but his composure had blown out of proportion.

Kaze's ears fell flat against his head, feeling scared.

"Shhh it's okay, I'm taking you to the infirmary." He carried his child to the ICU.

"Ish Kwitty gonna die?"

"NO!" He himself was getting scared...for his son. He tried to calm down and kissed Kaze's forehead, "I mean, no little one...I promise; We will help you. Don't worry..."

"Pinky...pwomise..? Dun make pwomises chu can't keep Daddy..."

"I...I promise." He wanted to make himself believe that. "I would never lie, okay?"

"O...kie..." He was feeling faint.

The nurse took the child from Allen. "Thank you for carrying him here...we'll take care of the rest."

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The Matron approached him, "Sir Walker."

"How is Kaze doing?"

"His case is complicated...unfortunately. The pain he feels is way too much for him."

"But..but there must be something you can do! Please help Kaze! I'll do whatever you need please!" He didn't want his precious child to die.

"It's either we do the painful medication or..."

"Or what?"

"..to put him to sleep."

"What? No, you can't..do that that's just...horrible." He can't stand the thought of his little angel in pain yet...the other option is just..."There must be something else, please anything but that!"

"As I said, we could go for the painful medication. He will heal. It's painful, but possible."

"I dont know what to do, I want him better but I don't want him in pain. C...can I see him?"

"Of course, you can, Sir Walker."

He smiled sadly, "Thank you." He went to Kaze's bed with a heavy heart. "Kitty?"

"Yesh, daddy...?" Kaze replied weakly.

Allen sat on the hospital bed and carried his angel to his lap. He opened his mouth to speak but tears fell first before he knew it.

"Daddy, what's wrong? Why ish chu cwying? Pwease tell kwitty..."

"I'm..." He sobbed quietly and hugged Kaze. "I'm so so sorry kitty, I want you to get better...I want to do whatever it takes for you to be better."

"Kwitty understands Daddy, nyaa..."

He looked at his little angel sadly and hung his head down. "I spoke with the doctor and he told me. Do you want to talk about it little one? I want to know what you feel and think about this."

"...Kwitty ish all ears..."

He tried his best not to cry again. "The doctor said that...you are in pain, lots of pain and that the only way for this to end is to take some painful medications to help you heal and get better or...or..." But it was just not right not to.

"O-Or what , daddy?" Kaze wiped away his tears dearly. "Dun cry..."

"Oh kitty." His tears didn't stop from falling. "They said that if you don't want to take the meds that it would be best to let you sleep...forever. I cant...I...I cant let you go. I want to help you but I don't want you in pain."

In a little while, Kaze knew what 'sleeping forever' means. For him, it means no more daddy and mommy or uncle and auntie...or everyone. "T-Then kwitty will endure the pain fwor daddy!"

Allen hugged Kaze tightly,crying still, "I'll do whatever you want, I'll help you in anything kitty but I don't want you to suffer anymore!"

"If kwitty hash to be in pain, kwitty will endure it until the end...!"

That little statement reminded him of Kanda so much. Their child was much braver than they think.

"But kitty...are you sure?"

"Kwitty ish sure! Kwitty wants to be with daddy!"

That enthusiasm and poker face...Kaze was truly his son.

"I will be by your side and help you with everything you need, okay? I will never leave you."

"Kwitty wuvs chu too much to leave you..."

"I love you too, Kitty..." Allen felt better, even if a little.

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Behind the door, Kanda cried silently.

Why do they have to suffer like this?

Is it the consequences of being together?

Fighting beside each other in this underground war?

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Allen went outside the room, only to see Kanda sitting near the door.

"How is he, Allen?"

The white haired teen knew Kanda's concern was genuine.

"He's fine for now. But the medication will bring a lot of pain."

Kanda gripped Mugen tightly.

"You know Allen I...made a decision." The raven looked up at the white ceiling, seemingly lost.

"I think so too."

"Let's end this goddamn war Allen."

"For Kaze?"

"For Kaze."

For their little angel is their beautiful damage.

**The End**

Majide* = Really


End file.
